Outlaws, Criminals, and Monsters Unite!

Now, let me be clear, I in no way endorse Satan, outhouses, peeing in the bushes or smoking. The communities in this country have gathered together in angry protest, to let the Outlaws, the Criminals, the Monsters (let’s just call them SMOKERS) know that they are angry that we are still interested in destroying our bodies, our temples, and stinking up the place while we’re at it. In our defense I would just like to say that we didn’t know when we started, that you would treat us quite this bad, or perhaps we wouldn’t have picked them up…..Nah, of course we would have. Don’t be ridiculous. I must say this is not a fun vice to have to carry around, but you angry non-smokers out there are not making it any harder on us with your shameful looks and ‘it stinks’ expressions, because the truth is, deep in the heart of each and every smoker in this world, there is a genuine happiness that exists when we piss people off. That being said, I have been trying to quit for two long years and have to date, been sadly unsuccessful. I have had many successes but nothing that has stuck just yet. Wish me well, that is, if you don’t hate me too much for it, and I will continue to try. I purchased this little book on a day of frustration with my inability to quit. This little book is a rallying manifesto for the 45 million Americans who are still pulling away and stubbornly refuse to quit, or just haven’t been successful at it yet. Being an outlaw smoker, it is hard at times to be unfazed by the bans sweeping the nation and so this little book is a rebellious ‘pick me up’ that aids you in forgetting the fact that you have a mindless addiction…Plus its funny.