Beck

My little (I think he is 3 or 4 years old) cousin came up to me last night and pointing at a cup I was holding said "Texie, can I have one of your sunflower seeds?" I said "Oh these are just the shells I have spit out; you don't want one of these they are gross." He then covered his mouth and with a worried expression whispered "I ate two of them". I smiled and said to his Mom "Beckett ate two shells out of my spit cup". She closed her eyes and quickly replied "Yeah I heard I'm just processing."

Day 18

It has now been 18 days since I last smoked. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done, I had to quit taking Chantix because it turned me into a crazy lady. The second I quit taking the Chantix all of the nicotine withdrawls came flooding on in, but I decided that no matter what I was not going to smoke. I was always afraid of quitting "Cold Turkey" because it sounded like torture. And it certainly was. The first week was offal. But it was not as bad as I always made it out to be. Now I am in week 3 without a cigarette and everything seems better. I think I can do this and I am so excited that I already have really.
I have a new found belief that there is nothing a pack of Jolly Ranchers and Davids Sunflower seeds cannot get me through if they could get me through that first week.
So its kinda lame that I am bragging like this but...yea me...I did it....well, I mean I probably did it.

Day 3

I quit smoking 3 days ago and its been going okay. Chantix works great except it turns you into a crazy person. At first I just sat on my couch and cried alot about nothing at all. Now it has turned into a hot ball of white anger. I am so annoyed that the tips of my toes feel angry and frusterated. I have to curl them to handle it. I mean I hate every single thing about this world. I hope the whole thing burns to the ground. And I hate me. I'm not exagerating like I usually do, that is really how I feel. In an hour or two I will most likely feel the opposite. But right this second I hate every single person, place and thing that I look at. I even hate this blog and how hateful it sounds. No I dont feel like harming myself or anyone else. I just feel really REALLY annoyed.

Buffy, Angel and a placed called Home

Well I have done it. After a long and seemingly horrific process, I am officially 6 days away from closing on a house. Someone told me “If you think getting into a house is horrible, wait till you try to get out”. That was scary. In fact the stress of this whole thing has aged me a decade I figure. Thank goodness that for the last two months I have not come home to worry myself sick about the house, but instead have been obsessed with watching the entire Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel series. Making home buying a nuisance and something that was taking up the time that I could have been spending in front of the TV. Important life lesson: If ever you are under extreme stress, you can turn on the tube and completely lose yourself in pretend people’s lives and just ignore your own. I realize that most of America has this already figured out, but I’m slow okay. Beth and Erin, its girlfriends like you that really know how to get a person through the fire. Had you not been such strong advocates for these shows, I may have never watched and I don’t know if I would have made it through the house buying process. Coarse, I am now forever upset that Spike died in the Hell Mouth and Buffy never realized that Lust is just as important as Love, but hey maybe Angel will make it all better! This next week will surely be filled with things I should be accomplishing and planning for, but instead I think I will be plopped down in front of the television immersed in the drama of demon killing. What I can pack and watch Kung foo at the same time.

Sweetie Pies

Okay this is the cutest idea that ever happened. They are mini pies (filled with fruit or chicken pot pie filling) that you pre-make and serve up when you want. So dang cute I can’t wait to make them.

First you have to have some fat necked (not skinny) ½ pint jars.

1. Make a pie dough.
2. Push the dough into the sides of the jar.
3. Fill with fruit or chicken pot pie filling. About ½ C. for each jar.
4. Using dough leftovers roll out and cut a topper using the jar lid.
Apple Pies: sprinkle with a brown sugar crumb topping.
Cherry Pies: Make a lattice
5. Cut slits with a knife (or use a cute mini cookie cutter) for venting.
6. Put the dough top over the pie and push against the sides of the jar to seal.
7. Add a small pad of butter on top of the crust.
8. Put the lids on tight and freeze them.
9. When ready set your oven at 375. Pull a few from the freezer and toss them into the oven for about 45 minutes. (Let them warm up with the oven so you don’t have any cold glass in oven issues).
10. When they are bubbly and warm throughout you serve and eat them in the JARS, is that adorable? I cant stand it, so cute.

If making chicken pot pies, and you can stand to do it, skip the crust on the insides of the jar and just add a top crust. It will save on the calories.
For the step by step go to: http://www.ourbestbites.com/2009/09/single-serving-pie-in-jar.html

Okay after this I'll shut up

I guess my complaint is that I don’t want to change the 'fundamentals' of our country (read yesterdays entry). I love my country, and although I am not opposed to change, especially when it comes to health care, I certainly am against a situation where our Government tells us what to do or penalizes us when we choose differently. WE DECIDE not them. Holy cow the audacity, I am an American, don’t tell me what to do or I will freak out! Isn’t changing the fundamentals really a change of our constitution? I mean those rights are the fundamentals of this country. It is their job to protect the constitution of the United States, but it is our personal responsibility to ensure that that is what they are doing. I may be reading into what he said a little more than I should, but that sentence is weird and it scares me. And the fact that there is so much confusion involved here makes me even more nervous. WHY ARE WE SO CONFUSED ABOUT SOMETHING THAT IS SUCH A BIG DEAL? I know it is our responsibility to inform ourselves, but as Beth and I were discussing yesterday, we have been reading and trying to inform ourselves, but finding an unbiased description of what is really going on is almost impossible. I have been trying to figure it out for a month now. This is BS! The rhetoric and politics feel like lies on both sides.

Change???

Six days ago, President Obama said “We are five days away from fundamentally transforming the United States of America”. Really? What does “Fundamental transforming” consist of? I have to ask because I think I am not the only uninformed person secretly wondering inside “Should I be scared?”