The Big 50

Michael Jackson turned 50 years old today. Wow and I suddenly feel extreamly old. He was 20 just yesterday, wearing that totally awasome red leather jacket while doing Thriller in my living room. At least he still resides inside the mind of a 10 year old boy right?

August 28th 2006

The last Birthday my Mom celebrated was 12 years ago. We went to Vae View Park and had lunch under the trees. Everything was very calm that day (a rare occurence in her life). We played Frisbee, and laughed, and lived in the moment. She said “this is the best Birthday I have ever had”. I wonder what made that Birthday so great for her. Was it because it would be her last and she knew it? Anyways to whatever sphere she now inhabits….Happy Birthday Mom.

The punishment for getting into the Christmas box and stringing ribbons all over the carpet is this:

A Cart Ride to Remember

The grapevine reported quite an occurrence from this weekend. To start I should note that when I am shopping with Bridger he will point out, upon store entry, those motorized chair scooter thingys and remark with longing his desire to ride in one. He does this often. I hear it all the time. He doesn’t want to walk around the store. Yes the epitome of lazy certainly comes to mind. He wants so much to jump inside one of those little motorized carts and Getty Up around the store. I always smile and keep walking when he begins these fantasies of running Willy Nilly around Wal-Mart, this is my way of letting him know that it’s just too ridiculous to even consider. Because it is, right?
So last week at work, Bridger hurt his back. He has been in a lot of pain and hasn’t been able to walk very well. So having to fill a prescription at Albertsons he walks….no…limps into the store when upon entry he sees it! The motorized cart! This was his chance. His one shining moment in time when he could get in the motha and drive to his heart’s content! He could do this…and keep his pride because after all he was actually hurt.
Now, when you do things like this (and to a much lesser extent, we all have) you know you are going to look like a complete idiot but what the hell, nobody knows you right? But come on, not when you were born and raised in Clinton Utah and your walking into the local Albertsons. EVERY ONE IS THERE. I run into someone I know every time I go there. So what must have run through his mind when he came upon my good friend Erin? Well, all of us normal people would be explaining, rationalizing, making sure the person didn’t walk away thinking were completely nuts right? Not Bridger. No explanation. Nothing. In fact it was reported back that there was a very strange “hey” (insert shyness) and then he kept on his way. Bridger, sometimes you really are the freakin greatest thing in my life. You do the things that I would never dare or have too much pride to do, and you remind me that it really doesn’t matter in the end. Sometimes, (given the circumstances) you are the only one I know who truly knows how to Keep It Simple.

I dont care what all of you say.... I love him, and I always will.

Exhaustion

Things happen when you’re exhausted. Exhaustion in and of itself can make for a pretty hard day what with the heavier than normal feeling in your legs and arms, the rolling of the eyes as you desperately try to focus on writing a manual that thousands of pilots and their supporters will read and take direction from (probably not important right?). The frequent head nod that comes when you unknowingly close your eyes and your body says “Now?? Can we sleep now?” But then there are the things that you don’t count on, weekly meetings that insist your attention be at perfection, the stupid decisions you make because your head is not clear enough to think it out, like pulling out in front of someone (and narrowly escaping with your life, and the life of your car) while you attempt to pull into work. The clumsiness that occurs when you pass by a hot cup of coffee that is sitting on your desk, bump it, and realize after it lands on your leg for 3 or 4 seconds that you might better move your butt! Or when you move your arm to shake a strangers hand who has specifically came into the office to introduce themselves to you (as you have spoken on the phone so many times) and your cuff hits a pair of scissors that fly off the desk and land in your foot! Yes I said IN the foot. Ouch.
All in all, I believe this is turning out to be a bit of a dangerous day for me. Beth once said as we were driving through the busy streets of Salt Lake “I am having a bad driving day” and this stuck with me. Because you don’t know what day is going to come along and remove your skills and abilities, making you feel a bit lacking in mental capacity. You can’t prepare for days like today.
You may be asking yourselves “Why does she feel so tired today?” Well, I will tell you. The answer is Annie. Isn’t it always! I gave Annie her first dose of medicine that is supposed to help her with her allergies, and that was a big mistake! She was up all night! Now, I don’t have a yard that I can throw her out in, nor would I….well probably not. No I attempted to lay in bed while she jumped, pounced, and tossed balls and any other toy she could find, at my face. I put her in the living room and went back to bed, closing my door, and this was apparently taken as the ultimate rejection so she sat at the door and cried and moaned and threw a fit that would shock the devil himself for about an hour. Bridger didn’t budge. He slept all night long, happy as could be. No, I don’t know how.

A Happy Little Tid Bit

Last Thursday I took Annie to the Vet for a skin biopsy. So sad, the tootle bug. She is doing fine and is now stitched up and happy again. The biopsy was conducted so that we could get verification of what we were really hoping was not a truth. That truth being that the reason Annie is losing her hair and having red itchy dots on her skin is related to an immune deficiency problem. This would be caused by my giving her so many antibiotics when she was a pup and therefore her immune system never matured enough to recognize things that were attacking her skin. (Like the little bugs that we all have on us). We have been fearful of what the test results might say, but Dr. Moss just called and said he got the tests back from the lab and Annie’s immune system is just fine. They indicate in fact, that she is having one heck of an allergic reaction and has been for months now! What is she allergic to? Who knows? Could be food (either what she eats from her bowl, or what she eats from my plate), could be mold, dust, grass, anything. The good news is that we can do tests to determine what she is allergic to and probably fix it. I wonder if she can outgrow her allergies? I did. Anyways, she is happy and healthy and everything is going to be aaaa okay! Hope for Annie.

Another Explaination

I guess I will explain myself and my last post. I cry for Mormonism because I think it is incredibly misunderstood. And I think these misunderstandings exist as much on the inside (by practicing people) as on the outside (by the non-practicing). I guess this last weekend I was thrown into a bit of a spiritual crisis when my very sweet, beautiful and extremely pious cousin sat down to have a talk with me. She currently has 3 boys and a year ago had the most darling little girl. Seriously if I could be guaranteed that I would give birth to a replica of this little girl I would do it in a second! She has red, curly hair, and fair skin, and the chubbiest little cheeks. I am pretty sure that I have never seen a child as beautiful as this one. I want to steal her. But that is beside the point. I asked my cousin if, now that she has had her little girl, if she is done having kids? And her smile dissipated from her face and then she shook her head. “Why” I asked, “Are you pregnant?” “No” she says “My husband wants to have more.” So I said “Well, if your done, your done. I mean you have given the man 4 kids.” And then she said “He wants more and before we got married we both agreed on lots and lots of kids”. So I say “So. Plans change.” And anyway the point of this dialog is that this fabulous girl is not able to make choices for herself. And I think its abusive, and I think it is wrong! She and her husband are extremely religious and I have heard him go off before on his “replenish the earth” speeches and apparently he won’t let it go. EVEN THOUGH HIS WIFE IS DONE!! I think it is disrespectful. And I think he does this simply because he is running a campaign for bishop. He wants to be the very best Mormon of all the Mormons that ever walked! It’s a big show you know? Nothing is really real with them. Everyone walks around with a forced smile and fake happy tone in their voice and I don’t even know my cousin anymore because she is so caught up in the role of “happy perfect Mormon”. I have seen the pressure that is put on the LDS to be perfect. But I do not believe that it is actually put on them by the church. These stereotypes are placed there by the actual people in the church, and it’s enough to cause Utah to have the highest suicide rate in the entire country! And so I cry for the church, because I think it is judged and misunderstood by non-Mormons. And I think it is equally misunderstood by its members, but in different ways. We are all human. God knows this and loves us without conditions. Regardless of whether we are married in the temple or have 50 million children. We are not our husband’s property either. We are each individuals that have choices to make and it makes me sad when my loved one feels so trapped and actually believes that its God’s will. Okay that’s it. Off my soap box. Besides, maybe I am wrong. Maybe God has expectations of us that some can’t live up to and if we don’t live up to them he will hate us and send us from his sight. (But I don’t think I am wrong.) I sure hope my cousin never reads this. I wanted to vent it but felt apprehension in posting something so controversial, especially when my whole family of LDS could read it at anytime. But you guys know me, I don’t let go of things. When I see something that I don’t think is right I stand up and declare it! I wouldn’t mind insight if you have some.

Mormonism

Ohhhhhhhhhh, sometimes I cry for you.

Robinson Family Reunion 2008

Last Thursday Bridger and I went to Bear Lake for the annual Robinson Family Reunion. What a fun trip. We took Annie and all her luxuries so that she would be as comfortable there as she is at home (although she certainly was not). She slept on a pillow most of the way and the other half of the time she enjoyed a nice big Dingo Bone. We arrived at camp around 6:30pm and almost immediately started making dinner. Dad had arrived in the morning so camp was already set up.

Nothing says bonding like father and son cooking meat outdoors.

Friday morning Dad and Bridger went to play golf, I stayed behind, did crafts and had long discussions with Annie about nothing at all. After Bridger and Dad returned we went after some yummy Bear Lake Raspberry shakes then drove up to Minnatonka Cave.

Leaving for a little morning golf

Early Morning rough housing

Friday Afternoon

On Saturday we went to the beach. Annie experienced sand for the first time and had a blast. Well at least for a while. She helped me dig holes for a while and then when she realized I had dug my own hole in the sand with my feet, and didn’t include her, she felt she must take ownership and playfully started attacking my feet. We took her over to the water and she had so much fun. At first she decided that these ‘waves’ must be trying to play with her because they would chase her and then receed. So she she chased them and then ran from them and then chased them again. It was hilarious. Bridger and I also took her out into the water where she couldn’t touch and encourgaged her to swim for the first time. She did great. She swam clear back to where she could touch (with a little assistance, I was afraid she would tire and sink, so I helped a bit) Anyway she had so much fun. I left Annie with some cousins and we went out on the boat for a while. There was a lot of wind and the waves were pretty high, about 4 feet. But that didn’t stop Bridger and Dad from tubbin’. For which I think they were both crazy! It looked like they were gonna fly off that tube and crash into the water from a 6’ drop.
When we got back to the beach Annie had been sitting for a long time in the middle of a pretty bad sand storm. She was exhausted and had sand all over her. Saddest was her big beautiful eyes were caked in sand. I immediately took her to the truck and got her out of the wind. I washed her eyes out and gave her some water because she was coughing and hacking. She went from having the best time of her life to being completely miserable. But then, isent that how a day at the beach always turns out? We went back to camp and after a good washing Annie went to bed and did not get up the rest of the night.

Grandma visiting with Dad

Bridger at Bear Lake

Uncle Dave, Dad, Aunt Karen and Uncle Steve

I bought that outfit for Dad, he looked so cool

Then somehow his shorts got twisted (litterally)

and then he threw on that hat! Oh well I guess it

just goes with him. What a nerd!

Waiting, with a sand covered face for me to brush her off.

Crashed in the truck

Gettin ready to go back to camp

Bridger, Dad and I went to the Pickleville Playhouse to see Broadways 'Thoroughly Modern Milley'. It was adorable and sooo fun. I know that the guys were doing this as a favor to me, but they even laughed a few times. (Bridger more than Dad, but at least Dad didnt fall asleep and start snoring or something.) We got back to camp pretty late and crashed out immediately.

On Sunday morning I sat outside in my lawn chair reading when I noticed Annie had these huge red blotches all over her skin. Her ears were swollen too. Then I flipped her on her stomach and she was covered with these huge welts. I thought it was possible that she was allergic to the Canine sunscreen I had been applying to her when we were at the beach the day before. And so I ran her into the camper and showered her down to rinse it all away. She felt pretty hot too. I called my friend Beth back at home and asked her to help me (because that’s what she always does) and she found a phone number for the Vet in Sunset, who would be open on Sunday. I called them and they said that it sounded like an allergic reaction to them as well, and advised me to give Annie some Benedryl. After about an hour her ‘perk’ came back and she started feeling better. Her hives went away and everything was okay. I tell you this dog is gonna be the death of me. I worry about her so much! Poor little toot.

We started packing for the ride home but stayed for a while and ate lunch with Dad. We left camp at about 3:00 and of coarse had to make one final stop for a Bear Lake Raspberry Shake!

Getting ready to leave

Eeks! Apparently they didnt want there picture taken anymore.

Anxiously waiting for Bridger to return with a shake

Bridger was so stoked to eat this shake. Look he's gleaming with joy.

Annie was so excited to get home. She went right back to her same ol’ games. (biting Bridgers feet, expecting us to throw a toy at least once every 20 seconds). I could tell she felt a ton better just being back home where she is happiest. It was such a fun weekend. The three of us barely argued at all, (a rare miricle) probably because we were so busy playing. I got to talk to a lot of my super great cousins, who I adore. And play with all their cute babies.